On your marks, get set, friend! 

From Mac Hall to TFDL, campus is buzzing with both new and returning students this fall semester. At first glance, it may be hard to tell that many of these students are struggling with loneliness.  

Commonly labeled by students as a “commuter campus,” the University of Calgary holds a reputation as a space that students visit out of necessity, often leaving campus to study and socialize elsewhere. Combined with a large campus population and an increasing prevalence of digital social interaction, it can be easy for students to fall susceptible to social isolation, even while surrounded by people.  

Mandy McCaughley, Community Training Coordinator with Campus Well-Being Services (within Student Wellness Services), is a part of the health promotion and outreach team that’s working to improve students’ experience and sense of belonging on campus. The solution? Speed friending workshops.  

So… what is Speed Friending? 

Speed Friending began at UCalgary under the initiative of Thomas Ambrozaitis, a counselor with Student Wellness Services. Ambrozaitis recognized a gap between lonely students and opportunities for them to connect with their peers.  

To help bridge this divide, Ambrozaitis developed a two-hour session, informed by his experience as a registered social worker and mental health clinician. The session included elements of cognitive-behavioural therapy, strategies for navigating social situations with confidence, and the chance for students to connect with one another face-to-face – all working together as proactive measures to address social isolation on campus. 

While Ambrozaitis now works at the School of Architecture, Planning and Design, his legacy continues through workshops continually hosted on campus. Collaborating with Campus Well-Being Services,  Ambrozaitis developed the hour-long session that students have the opportunity to attend today.  

What can students expect? 

The sessions are organized and facilitated by Campus Well-Being Services’ Health Promotion and Outreach Team. McCaughley, who helps plan and deliver the workshops, explained what students can anticipate going into the session.  

“The first 20 minutes of the workshop is a bit more content heavy, just kind of looking at normalizing that experience of loneliness,” says McCaughley. During this portion, a Health Promotion staff member leads a discussion on the common barriers and anxieties surrounding social connection on campus. The key takeaway? That loneliness isn’t something to be ashamed of. 

Your social isolation or loneliness is not a personal failure. It's not a reflection on who you are.

Following this segment, the session will cover strategies to challenge a self-blaming mindset and overcome fears surrounding socializing. Putting these skills to practice, students then jump into the most fun part of the workshop: one-on-one Speed Friending. Students are given three minutes to introduce themselves and chat with their peers, with a choice of using optional icebreaker questions or simply talking about whatever comes to mind. Over five to six rounds, students switch partners each time, giving them the chance to meet a variety of new people. 

Whether students are looking to rehearse their skills or expand their social circle, they are invited to attend the workshop with no expectations.  

 “Go into this with no pressure,” advises McCaughley. “You’re not expected to meet your best friend. It can be a really nice opportunity for students to just practice and connect with another student.”  

Why you should attend  

While loneliness is a common aspect of student experience, with 23% of young adults (aged 15–24) reporting that they always or often feel lonely, students may not be aware of the widespread impacts of social isolation.  

According to a 2024 study on the impact of loneliness on academic success, heightened loneliness is a significant predictor of academic underperformance among university students. “Feeling socially connected and feeling a sense of belonging on campus is actually going to have an impact on our academic success,” says McCaughley. 

In addition to faltering academic achievement, isolation can increase one’s risk to both physical and mental health ailments, such as coronary heart disease,  stroke, and depression. As such, McCaughley advises students to block time in their schedule for socializing — even when life gets hectic.  

“I think too when times get busy that can sometimes be the first thing to go,” says McCaughley. “It is seen as something that's maybe extra when we have time for it, but being able to build it into your schedule can be very helpful.” 

Making space for connection 

Campus events and programs, like Speed Friending, are useful tools to support students who want to increase their socialization. McCaughley also encourages students to check out additional resources that UCalgary offers—such as the Women's Resource Center, the Faith and Spirituality Center, Drop-in Peer Support, Weekly Walks, and more.  

What sets Speed Friending apart is that it acknowledges that meeting new people can be uncomfortable. “A really cool thing about it is that we do say that it can feel awkward,” says McCaughley. Naming that awkwardness can make it easier to take the first step. 

Still feeling nervous about attending a Speed Friending workshop? McCaughley offers this advice: “You can feel afraid and do it anyway.” You don’t have to feel entirely confident to participate. The first step to connection is simply showing up.  

Tips and tricks 

Not able to attend a workshop? Sehra Jaffery, Health Promotion and Outreach Program Assistant with Campus Wellbeing Services, has compiled some of her top-tips for sparking connection in everyday situations. 

1. Try saying hi to someone you sit beside in class! You don’t have to have a whole conversation. Even just introducing yourself is a step, and the next time you see them, you’ll have a familiar face.  
2. Keep showing up. Whether that’s a club, volunteering, or a campus event, seeing the same people regularly makes connecting feel more natural. Give yourself time to get comfortable with people. 
3. Start with something you already have in common. “How are you finding this class?” or “Have you been to one of these events before?” You don’t need the perfect opening line. A simple question can go a long way. 
4. Looking for a way to turn an acquaintance into a friend? Follow up! If someone mentions an exam or something they’re looking forward to, ask them how it went the next time you see them. It shows you were listening and gives you something to connect over. 
5. When dealing with rejection… it can feel personal, especially when putting yourself out there already took a lot of courage. But one interaction doesn’t determine your worth or how likeable you are. People have their own things going on, and sometimes the connection just isn’t there. Let yourself feel disappointed, but give yourself credit for trying and stay open to other people.